self expression

"But, I Can't Dance."

How many of you avoid dancing because you subscribe to the belief that, “𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘰𝘯’𝘵 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘵𝘰 𝘥𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦” or “𝘺𝘰𝘶’𝘳𝘦 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘢 𝘥𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘳?”

🙋‍♀️🙋‍♀️🙋‍♀️

For as long as I can remember, that was the exact story I kept telling myself. Dancing felt awkward, uncomfortable, and the thought perpetually playing in my head would be, “𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯’𝘵 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬 𝘐’𝘮 𝘥𝘰𝘪𝘯𝘨.”

And to a certain degree, I still don’t. But the difference between now and then isn’t that I know how to dance with these fluid, choreographed motions—it’s that I let go; let go of what I think I’m supposed to look like and let go of how others might perceive me.

You don’t have to be a dancer to move your body to a song, boo—𝐝𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐨𝐧𝐞.

All you have to do is move your body in whatever way feels right and sometimes it might look weird and silly and that’s perfectly okay.

Dancing is a beautiful way to express yourself, foster a deeper connection with your body, and most importantly bring you to the present moment.

Do it. Dance. Freely. Habitually. It’s good for your soul.

xx

Devi

Loving Yourself is Hard

“Just love yourself,” they say (🧐). As if it was easy. As if you could undo and reprogram everything you’ve been taught—from the beginning—with a flip of switch. As if you could rewrite the script you’ve been rehearsing for years, and memorize an entirely new narrative overnight.

“Aha. You’re so right. Why didn’t I ever think of that?! Let me just looveeee myself.”

LOL.

This notion floating around that repeating positive affirmations and relinquishing people’s opinions will fix all your problems, IS the problem.

Don’t get me wrong, these are effective tools that put you in an advantageous position and they’re part of the puzzle piece. But, it’s far more than just saying words and releasing the need for external validation.

While there is good intent behind this messaging, it can be extremely crippling and harmful to those learning how to love themselves.

Because what happens is you’ll look in the mirror, repeat the affirmation, and think, “Why isn’t this fucking working? How come everyone on Instagram loves themselves by saying this and it doesn’t do anything for me.”

All it did was perpetuate more judgement, more self-criticism, and made you feel even worse.

As much as I wish it was an overly simplistic process; that you could just tell yourself you ‘love yourself,’ and then all of your insecurities, fears, bruises, and problems evaporate.

It just doesn’t work that way.

I want you to know that wherever you are right now and however you feel, you are perfectly okay. You’re exactly where you need to be.

AND you can take ONE step forward in the direction you’re longing for.

Maybe it’s reading a book, hiring a body image coach, going to therapy, moving your body consistently, eating a vegetable, working with me (🤪). Whatever makes YOU feel 1% better.

It’s your process, boo. Don’t let this skewed version of self love make you think it’s supposed to be seamless and quick and constantly full of light. It’s not.

Hang in there. I know it’s tough. But, I believe in you and I’m here to help you, if you need. 🖤 Luuuh you.

Devi

Severing Friendships As You Evolve

Like the moon, you will transform with each phase you go through. And there will be someone in your life—someone you even consider your closest and longest friend—who will absolutely hate your transformation.

The will shame you, judge you, reject you, and tell you your new way of being is “wrong.”

But it’s not. 𝘐𝘵’𝘴 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘥𝘪𝘧𝘧𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘵.

Different from what you once were, and that’s okay. You’re supposed to change—that’s concomitant with age, pain, lessons, experiences, and all the other various things in life that shift you.

Your beliefs, values, likes, dislikes, and views will evolve into something slightly or entirely new. And sometimes the newness will make or break a relationship, and this is a truth—a hard one—you must accept when it means the breaking of one.

Where you once both shared a profound connection—now, there’s only resentment, annoyance, conflict, and arguments due to your transition altering that.

You’re moving into a direction they don’t like or understand. And as a result, they attack you and you find yourself in defense mode or maybe even feeling guilty for something that feels right to you.

And yes, there are occasions where you both find resolution or step in a place of acceptance and all of the trouble eventually dissipates. But every so often, as I said, the relationship must come to an end.

You can’t continue or afford to hold and attach to relationships that keep you stagnant and stifle your growth. It must be severed in order to support your expansion.

So yes, as you change, sometimes that means a relationship must change, too. This is okay. It doesn’t make you wrong. It doesn’t even make them wrong. It just means you two are no longer in alignment.

Grow. Shed. Change. Evolve. It’s beautiful. It’s necessary. It’s needed.

Love,

Devi